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Richards Family Adventures: Over the Pacific on Our Way Home (Hellos and Goodbyes)
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Over the Pacific on Our Way Home (Hellos and Goodbyes)
January 5, 2011
I haven’t blogged in months, but feel the need to do so now. I feel this strange mix between gratefulness and sadness, between friends gained and friends lost. Ohana soon-to-see and ohana left- behind.
It took an 11 year-old boy to jump-start my thinking, and my emotions. Little boys (and even big boys) are known for not being in touch with their feelings—or knowing how to express their feelings when they have them. We were all getting ready to go to bed on our last evening of a New Year’s visit to Portland. These are dear friends with whom we stayed our last few nights prior to embarking on this journey, who drove us to the airport on our send-off to YWAM 15 months ago. These are the same friends who were able to scrape together the days off-and the money-earned to fly to Kona—our only visitors—around our oldest son’s 11th birthday.
It was that son’s best friend who now shook my consciousness a little. It wasn’t by what he did, but by what he could not do. When asked by their mother to say goodbye to Evan and Jo Jo, Adin, the younger boy whom Fetta refers to as “my verbal son,” came down to our basement digs and stood tall, looking us in the eyes. “I want to say goodbye and to wish you safe travels on your journey.” Wow. His older brother? “He is in bed; he cannot bring himself to say goodbye to Evan.” Huh. After some hesitation, Evan wandered in to Noah’s room. They chatted about whatever 11 year-old boys do, and said a brief goodbye.
I pondered this as I got up early the next morning, allowing time to run upstairs and catch Noah before he headed to school. I just had to get a big hug in with this best-friend-of-my-son. You see, this non-verbal boy almost knocked me over when we first arrived, his hug was so welcoming. It wasn’t at their door; it was on the driveway as he flew out of his house. Kinda like Evan when he decided he couldn’t wait to greet Noah at their Kona hotel six weeks earlier—he had to surprise him at the airport, with one of the biggest smiles I’d seen on his face since we started this adventure a year earlier.
Knowing leaving was hard, we decided to leave a couple of Kona candies with these special friends: two chocolate-covered mac nuts for two wonderful brothers. Together with a card we each signed, we hoped to sweeten the sadness that our exit would leave behind.
This ease-in-welcoming and difficulty-with-leaving was repeated as we had dinner with our former neighbors. Cherie and Kerie were happy to catch us briefly after a dessert at our old house, but wanted more time. They invited us over a few nights later after a busy Sunday afternoon. The conversation was easy over beef stroganoff, and our boys quickly flew upstairs for Lego-building and Star Wars-watching (two of their favorite pastimes, which they shared in common with the neighbor kids). At some point in the conversation, Cherie asked how long we’d continue on this teaching-children-overseas adventure. She said nothing at our “2-5 years” response, but when I talked about the improved-decorating of our former-home-now-rental, she quipped, “All the better for you to enjoy when you come home!”
“They’re having a hard time with this,” I thought to myself. Randy seconded this view when he noted Ashley fleeing up the stairs to keep from crying as we left.
From the Portland area we made our way up the rainy highway towards Seattle, including the longed-for stop at Krispy Kreme Doughnuts. My sister and her family were again so happy to see us. I quickly accepted that my body was exhausted. Now on our last night of our first vacation from YWAM, I recounted how many friends had welcomed us on this trip: sixteen households had happily hugged us and then said goodbye. I was fine with this. Exhausted, but fine.
After an early-to-bed prior to an early-to-rise for Sea-Tac Airport, I began to crack. I was side-swiped with sadness. I found myself weeping at not-big things. When my sister stopped me for one final hug in front of Hawaiian Air, I broke. Jolie, my sweet sister, had made a special trip to Whole Foods for garnishes for her gourmet soup and clotted cream for her anglophile sibling. Now a few hours later, she was smiling her winning smile as she squeezed a goodbye. I could not hold back the tears. I realized this was harder than I thought. I hadn’t counted on being broad-sided with those feelings. Not only was my body not accustomed to the cold, damp climate (I’d gone to bed early with Vitamin C), but my emotions were not handling these goodbyes.
I settled in to my airport seat to await our next chapter when an idea struck me: the Frango chocolate in my purse--a sweet sentiment from my Seattle sister. Like our intention with the Kona candy left for our boys’ buddies, I was now comforted by a similar act. I slowly ate the chocolate, savoring the memories of each hello and goodbye.
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God {via my sister}. II Corinthians. 1:3-4 Here are some of the loved ones we got to hug on during our first trip home in 15 months.
Evan hugged by Cousin Ike at Christmas
Greetings from Uncle Rob and Aunt Sharon, Christmas dinner at brother Andrew’s.
Christmas hugs for Anna Linda Hugs with neice Claire
Hugs with Grandma and her four children and hubbies
Hugs with Dad!
Hugs from teacher friend Sue Carlson at Cedar Tree on a frosty first-day-of-school in 2011
Guys Going Goofy at the Geisel’s
Hugs in our former home with good friend/hostess Natasha Poonka
Hugs with former neighbor Barb Sauer
Getting Increasingly Goofy with Marcus in our former home
Wonderful histories with Neighbor Mike, Phillip and Andrew Poonka
A warm Hug on a Cold Day from Niece Sauni
From Zimbabwe to Tonga and back: Randy and sister Kim exchange a New Year’s hug
A welcome visit from our Kiwi-Singapore City Bible friends Lois and Steve Ross (whose daughter, Grace, was in Evan’s preschool class)
HUGS FROM FORMER NEW SONG FRIENDS, ROOMMATES, AND PASTORS
On the way home from Albany, hugs at sunset
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